STACK #153 Jul 2017

CINEMA REVIEWS

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THE MUMMY

RELEASED: June 8 DIRECTOR: Alex Kurtzman CAST: Tom Cruise, Russell Crowe, Sofia Boutella, Annabelle Wallis RATING: M A mummy movie starring Tom Cruise. Russell Crowe as Dr. Jekyll. The prospect of "a new world of gods and monsters" under Universal's new 'Dark Universe' banner. It's hard not to be cynical about this move to resurrect the studio's iconic monsters as part of a Marvel-like shared universe. The Mummy gets things off to a bumpy start with a new take on the legendary creature that's far removed from the 1932 original and Brendan Fraser remake. The Egyptian in question is Princess Ahmanet (Boutella) – mummified alive for an unspeakable crime and unearthed in the present day by Cruise's soldier of fortune. Now on the loose in London, Ahmanet seeks an ancient gem that will summon the God of Death, and Cruise is her chosen vessel. Enter Dr. Jekyll, a specialist in the nature of evil who intends to capture the mummy for his experiments. With a lab full of arcane artifacts, he's destined to become the Nick Fury of this Dark Universe. It's basically Mummy: Impossible, but more monster movie than Tom Cruise actioner. Horror fans will find plenty to enjoy, with nods to The Exorcist and An American Werewolf in London . However, the film it most closely resembles is Tobe Hooper's insane Lifeforce – sans the nudity and crazy tone. An uneasy mix of olde worlde horrors and contemporary blockbuster razzmatazz, the creation of this new Dark Universe isn't exactly a big bang, but neither is it a whimper. Scott Hocking DESPICABLE ME 3 RELEASED: June 15 DIRECTORS: Kyle Balda, Pierre Coffin CAST: Steve Carell, Kristen Wiig, Steve Coogan RATING: PG When last we met, the dastardly Gru (Steve Carell) had been turned to the side of good by new wife Lucy (Kristen Wiig), as well as his trio of adopted “leetle gorls”. But is Gru really a changed grump, or is it a case of once a bad guy, always a bad guy? Enter shoulder-padded supervillain Balthazar Bratt (Trey Parker) – a former ’80s child star who’s lost track of the line between his TV role and real life. Yes, he’s bad, really bad, and he’s got the explosive bubble gum to prove it! Gru is still under the employ of the Anti-Villain League, until a failed takedown of Bratt sees both he and Lucy sacked. Then comes word that Gru has a twin brother, named Dru (also Carell), who’s everything that Gru isn’t – rich, stylish and, well, not bald. But he’s been a failure in the family business of evilness, and wants to tempt Gru back into the life. Will our anti-antihero succumb to the temptation? While Despicable Me 2 didn’t quite get the balance right in keeping adults and kids equally amused throughout, this third outing is more bang-on. From choice ’80s cuts (Michael Jackson, Madonna, A-ha, Nena) bumping it with new Pharrell tracks, plenty of genuinely clever-funny era-related gags (thank you, Van Halen) and just the right amount of slapstick, Despicable Me 3 is genuinely superb all-family entertainment. Amy Flower

RELEASED: June 22 DIRECTORS: Michael Bay CAST: Mark Wahlberg, Laura Haddock, Anthony Hopkins RATING: M

TRANSFORMERS: THE LAST KNIGHT

A Knight to forget.

T o make the plot of Transformers: The Last Knight easier for you to understand than it was for us, you need to know that King Arthur and his Knights of the Round Table – along with the wizard Merlin (played by Stanley Tucci, mind you) – actually had their power bestowed upon them by an ancient race of Transformers, via the Staff of Quintessa. Cade Yeager (Mark Wahlberg) is now in hiding with a group of Autobots he's rescued and winds up in possession of a strange amulet that binds itself to his body. He also adopts an orphaned girl, Izabella (Isabela Moner), who knows her way around a toolbox and has an attitude to match. Yeager ends up crossing paths with English mare Vivian (Laura Haddock), who, as it turns out, is the last living descendant of Merlin. She's been recruited to the cause by Sir Edmund Burton (Anthony Hopkins), a bound secret keeper for the Transformers and their presence here on Earth. When old Optimus Prime finally reaches

Cybertron (following the events of Age of Extinction ), he's brainwashed by Quintessa to take over the Earth and plunder its resources to rebuild his home planet. Vivian and Cade therefore become humanity's last hope. If all this sounds messy, that's because it is. Bad writing and bored actors suggest that at some point during the last ten years, the Transformers franchise has lost its way. Events in The Last Knight seem to exist solely to serve a plot that can't even decide who the antagonist actually is. Megatron is no longer threatening, and changing the voice actor does him no favours. Even cameos from Simmons (John Turturro) and Lennox (Josh Duhamel) can't save this one. Transformers: The Last Knight is a Michael Bay movie, which means lots of wide sunset shots, a pounding soundtrack, chaotic editing, and more pyrotechnics than New Year's Eve in Sydney. The robots themselves still look great, but some of the smaller-scale CGI stuff appears slightly rushed. If the franchise is to continue, Bay will have to start scouring for more obscure historical events to attribute to the Autobots and

RATING KEY: Wow! Good Not bad Meh Woof!

Decepticons. And if the post-credits scene is anything to

go by, this doesn't appear to be the end for these robots in disguise. Sigh. Alesha Kolbe

JULY 2017

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